Foundations of Teaching and Correction
In order to make any kind of impact in our children's lives, there are certain foundations that we have to create to be successful. The Parenting Pyramid, created by the Arbinger Company, demonstrates this principle. Those foundations are our personal way of being, our relationship with our spouse, our relationship with our children, and lastly our teaching and corrections.
Personal Way of Being
Children watch. They listen. They internalize. The way we treat ourselves is of the utmost importance. If we beat ourselves up after we make a mistake, they may be scared to come to us when they make a mistake. By being forgiving, especially of ourselves, we are creating an atmosphere of trust.
As parents, we are setting an example for our children. Though they might not admit it at times, children are following in our footsteps every day. Corrections and teachings will not work if it is founded upon a lie. As parents and teachers, we must practice what we preach.
By being confident with ourselves, we can send a message of authority and self-love. We may not know exactly what we're doing all the time; we all have struggles. It is okay to struggle. It's even better to overcome those struggles and love yourself despite those flaws.
Our Relationship with Our Spouse
By treating one another with love, children really get to understand the semantics of forming close relationships by watching their parents interact. What's the point of being nice to others when mommy and daddy aren't even getting along?
Our relationship with our spouse should mirror and complement our spouse's parenting style. It's easy to get confused when mom said something was okay, but dad said something was forbidden. Never contradict one another; it ruins one another's credibility. It can even ruin your marriage.
Our Relationship with Our Children
Without a foundation of trust in the relationship we have with our children, it's hard to get kids to open up. Admitting mistakes, especially to parents, can be hard. It's easy to lock-up that information and be secretive when you know your parents aren't really trying to be your friend.
Though we try to be our children's mentor in life, it's better to empathize with them. Through good listening, we can send the message to our children that we really do care about what's going on in their lives. If they think that we don't understand, then we should ask them to help us to understand. All of this is a great effort to building a relationship of trust and an open environment.
Teaching and Correction
Among the many qualities of parenting, teaching seems to stick out. A parent is truly a teacher in everything that they do. From teaching kids to use the toilet to how to do the laundry, everything we do is an example to our children. Foundational to these lessons of teaching, the role of a teacher must be established.
What is a teacher?
A teacher guides. They help their students find truth. Often, they know the best ways to help students individually, as well as collectively. They have had extensive training on how to best help their students. They know what's right, and they are there to guide their students in the right direction.
Just as a teacher cannot teach without a student, a student cannot learn without a teacher. It is upon trust that the student can come to the teacher. So, it is a teacher's job to establish a foundation of trust. Then, it is up to the student to come to the teacher in order to learn.
Nothing About The Pyramid is Isolated
Everything about this pyramid mimics our Savior's example. Not only did he die for us, but he taught us an important part about parenting and leadership: you won't make any progress unless you start from a place of love. By loving yourself, your spouse, and your children, you can teach. Because of Christ's undying love for us, we are assured that his teachings, as well as his corrections, are coming from a place of concern; not a place of disappointment.
Christ's teachings radiated out of him because his love radiated out of him. Everything he taught was based on his love, and genuine concern. Striving to be like the Savior and striving to be a good parent, can be one and the same.
If we want to fix something in our teaching, the answer usually lies in another part of the pyramid. It is upon a solid foundation that teaching and correction are most effective. If we aren't doing it out of love, or if our children don't know what we're doing it out of love, nothing is ever going to get done.
Personal Way of Being
Children watch. They listen. They internalize. The way we treat ourselves is of the utmost importance. If we beat ourselves up after we make a mistake, they may be scared to come to us when they make a mistake. By being forgiving, especially of ourselves, we are creating an atmosphere of trust.
As parents, we are setting an example for our children. Though they might not admit it at times, children are following in our footsteps every day. Corrections and teachings will not work if it is founded upon a lie. As parents and teachers, we must practice what we preach.
By being confident with ourselves, we can send a message of authority and self-love. We may not know exactly what we're doing all the time; we all have struggles. It is okay to struggle. It's even better to overcome those struggles and love yourself despite those flaws.
Our Relationship with Our Spouse
By treating one another with love, children really get to understand the semantics of forming close relationships by watching their parents interact. What's the point of being nice to others when mommy and daddy aren't even getting along?
Our relationship with our spouse should mirror and complement our spouse's parenting style. It's easy to get confused when mom said something was okay, but dad said something was forbidden. Never contradict one another; it ruins one another's credibility. It can even ruin your marriage.
Our Relationship with Our Children
Without a foundation of trust in the relationship we have with our children, it's hard to get kids to open up. Admitting mistakes, especially to parents, can be hard. It's easy to lock-up that information and be secretive when you know your parents aren't really trying to be your friend.
Though we try to be our children's mentor in life, it's better to empathize with them. Through good listening, we can send the message to our children that we really do care about what's going on in their lives. If they think that we don't understand, then we should ask them to help us to understand. All of this is a great effort to building a relationship of trust and an open environment.
Teaching and Correction
Among the many qualities of parenting, teaching seems to stick out. A parent is truly a teacher in everything that they do. From teaching kids to use the toilet to how to do the laundry, everything we do is an example to our children. Foundational to these lessons of teaching, the role of a teacher must be established.
What is a teacher?
A teacher guides. They help their students find truth. Often, they know the best ways to help students individually, as well as collectively. They have had extensive training on how to best help their students. They know what's right, and they are there to guide their students in the right direction.
Just as a teacher cannot teach without a student, a student cannot learn without a teacher. It is upon trust that the student can come to the teacher. So, it is a teacher's job to establish a foundation of trust. Then, it is up to the student to come to the teacher in order to learn.
Nothing About The Pyramid is Isolated
Everything about this pyramid mimics our Savior's example. Not only did he die for us, but he taught us an important part about parenting and leadership: you won't make any progress unless you start from a place of love. By loving yourself, your spouse, and your children, you can teach. Because of Christ's undying love for us, we are assured that his teachings, as well as his corrections, are coming from a place of concern; not a place of disappointment.
Christ's teachings radiated out of him because his love radiated out of him. Everything he taught was based on his love, and genuine concern. Striving to be like the Savior and striving to be a good parent, can be one and the same.
If we want to fix something in our teaching, the answer usually lies in another part of the pyramid. It is upon a solid foundation that teaching and correction are most effective. If we aren't doing it out of love, or if our children don't know what we're doing it out of love, nothing is ever going to get done.
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